How to Get What You Want in Divorce Mediation

Better Yet, How to Get What’s “Fair”

At Affordable Mediation, we help each partner get what’s “Fair”, rather than help one partner get the better of the other. By avoiding a court-contested divorce, you’ll not only save a ton of money, but you’ll get to an agreement that both sides feel is fair. So, what is “fair” in divorce?

Divorce Mediation: What is Fair?

Everyone’s personal sense of fairness is different.  We approach fairness as addressing everyone’s needs and goals in a manner that works for everyone.  Think about your personal goals for [moving forward] and how best to reach them. If those goals are reasonable and practical, given your personal situation and financial reality, you may very well get those, and that might feel fair to you — to both of you.

Divorce Mediation Achieves Fairness Better Than a Court Battle

You don’t have to agree to anything in mediation until it feels fair to you.  We encourage couples to continue to talk things through until they both feel what they are getting is as fair as can be, given the situation.  If you go to court, on the other hand, you may be ordered to do something that feels unfair or even egregious, for which you will have no say or control. In mediation, you control the entire process and outcome.

“How do I prepare to get what I want in the divorce?”

Be prepared for a drama-free divorce mediation, not a negotiation battle. Gather information, be prepared to identify your wants, needs and goals. Additionally, ready yourself for the following:

  • Be flexible and ready to compromise with your spouse.
  • Be aware of and process any strong emotions and think about how they play into your requests.
  • Be forthcoming, honest and transparent about what you want and your concerns or doubts.
  • Have support systems in place.
  • Ask as many questions as you need to feel comfortable with your options.

We’re Here to Help You Through Divorce Mediation

We have prepared a process to help get you prepared for your divorce mediation (including this Free Checklist). Your pre-mediation homework will help you understand the kinds of things we’ll be discussing, help you set healthy expectations early on and define your goals. We make sure each person has a chance to fully explain his or her position and feelings and be heard by his or her spouse and the mediator. At the end of your mediation sessions, you’ll be confident that your needs were addressed, and you will be confident that you have an equitable and fair outcome.