There was a debate on the radio this morning (I know, I still don’t subscribe to Satellite which irritates my husband to no end) about whether to continue to spend Super Bowl Sunday together after your divorce for the sake of the kids. The caller explained that it had been a family tradition and the kids wanted to continue with it, but that for her, the divorce was too fresh and she did not want to spend 4-5 hours with her ex.
Callers had various takes on the situation, but the consensus was that if it was a family tradition and the parents could be together through the Super Bowl without a lot of contention or arguing, then, yes, the family tradition should continue at least for a few years. If, on the other hand, tension and animosity would be felt and obvious to the children, then, no, it was time to create new family traditions.
Interestingly, we do discuss this and other family traditions, such as opening presents Christmas morning, and jointly taking the kids out Trick-or-Treating, in our divorce mediation sessions. And, like most scenarios in life, no two families are exactly alike in how they approach traditions after divorce. Because couples who use mediation for their divorce tend to remain friendly or, at least, civil to each other, most try to honor the family traditions jointly for at least the first year following their divorce. They report it seems to make the transition easier for the kids and reinforces the idea that they are still a family, although it has taken on a different look.
So, for this Super Bowl Sunday, let me know how your family plans to handle this situation and, subsequently, how it all worked out. I love hearing stories of how families move forward after divorce!